November is National Adoption Month. So, what does that mean? It’s a time to celebrate families created through adoption and recognize homes that have provided safe and loving environments for children and adolescents in need. It’s also a time to acknowledge and spread awareness for the continued need for adoptive homes, particularly for older children who are currently in foster care.
In my professional and personal background, I have experience with the foster care system, adoption through foster care, and private adoption. For almost a decade, I worked with foster youth, foster parents, and biological parents whose children were in foster care. This work showed me the immense need for foster parents in our country. Becoming a foster parent requires many things – most importantly, in my opinion, is an understanding of how trauma impacts a child’s emotional development and requires trauma-informed care. Every child in the foster care system has suffered some form of loss or trauma, but each child’s trauma is unique to them. Another incredibly important point for foster parents to understand is that the goal of foster care is actually not adoption; it’s reunification. In most cases, the permanency goal is to reunify a child with their biological family. Of course, this doesn’t always happen, but it’s important for foster parents to be supportive of this goal and to be supportive of the biological parents as they work to achieve this. In the case where a parent or parents are unable to safely take their children back into their care, the permanency goal is then changed to adoption.
I became a foster parent, myself, in 2017 and welcomed an eight-year-old girl into my home. I didn’t become a foster parent with the goal of adopting, but I was open to it. After a couple of years, her permanency goal was changed to adoption, and in 2021, I adopted her. Parenting a child with a trauma history is the most challenging thing I’ve ever done; it is hard to put into words for those who haven’t experienced it. While it’s certainly not been easy, and there have been many moments of self-doubt, I remember that I do this for her – to enable her to have more options in life, to have a place to call home without being worried about having to move unexpectedly and to have a safe space with someone who’s never giving up on her. My journey to parenthood was unexpected: adoption instead of biological children. A chatty, creative, and loving third grader who came to me with worn-out Hello Kitty pajamas, eight years of lived experience, and an intense need to be wanted and loved. Now, she is a freshman in high school, and we’re navigating the teen years as best we can!
My professional life has shifted from foster care to the world of private adoption. For the last 2+ years, I have had the incredible honor and privilege of helping families adopt in a way that is very different from my own adoption experience. Though adopting from foster care and adopting privately is different, some experiences are shared. Families and individuals go through an extensive assessment process and receive training. There is waiting and unknowns, and ultimately, a child. Private adoption, in most cases, means adopting a newborn. I work with all kinds of people – LGBTQ+ couples, couples who tried to conceive and struggled with infertility or high-risk pregnancies, and individuals who long to be parents. They provide loving, nurturing homes to children who need a home, not from foster care, but from birth parents who are making the informed and, I would say, loving choice to not parent their child for whatever the reason. The adoptive parents I work with start their parenting journey most often at the beginning of that child’s life, often having the opportunity to be present at the hospital for their child’s birth. It is a joy for me to get to know these families and celebrate with them when their baby is born.
Whether adopting through foster care or private adoption, families are built and grown in different ways, each bringing unique challenges and joy.
If you’re interested in learning more about adoption through foster care, contact Adoption Rhode Island: Adoption RI.
If you’re interested in learning more about private domestic or international adoption, contact me at cwild@jcsri.org.
Carol Wild is the program coordinator at Adoption Options, a program of Jewish Collaborative Services, where she has worked since June of 2021, maintaining agency licensure, overseeing all adoptive families in Rhode Island and Massachusetts, organizing all components of the home study process, and writing home studies. Before joining the staff at JCS, Carol worked in foster care services in Rhode Island, where she supervised parent-child visits, helped birth parents work towards reunification with their children in care, assisted with the placement of foster children, taught courses to foster parent applicants, oversaw ongoing education for licensed foster families, and oversaw the licensing process for foster parent applicants including training and writing home studies.
By JCS’ Clinical Supervisor, Diana Huynh, LICSW, PMH-C
October is a month dedicated to Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness, a subject that profoundly impacts many families in our community. This article sheds light on the prevalence of miscarriages, stillbirths, and neonatal deaths while emphasizing the importance of offering support to those who have experienced perinatal loss.
Miscarriage, unfortunately, remains a common experience for many families. Current statistics indicate that approximately 10-20% of known pregnancies result in a miscarriage, defined as a pregnancy loss before 20 weeks of gestation. Additionally, while less frequent than miscarriages, stillbirth is also significant in our communities, with statistics indicating that 1 in 100 pregnancies result in stillbirth, defined as the loss of a pregnancy after 20 weeks. Given statistics like these, it’s likely that you or someone you know has experienced perinatal loss.
Despite the prevalence of perinatal loss, families often grieve silently, with their sorrow going unrecognized by the community around them. An “unwritten rule” dictates that pregnancy should not be disclosed until after the first trimester, contributing to a sense of secrecy and shame surrounding miscarriages. The experience and the potential ensuing isolation can leave families feeling lost, disenfranchised, and unseen. Similarly, the intensity of grief associated with stillbirths can create a sense of disconnection from those around them. Regardless of the specific circumstance—be it miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal death—the loss of a child forces us to grieve not only for what was but also for what could have been and the future we had envisioned. The goal of raising awareness is to provide hope that more families will find the support they need and foster a sense of connection with others who understand the complexity of this loss.
If someone you know has experienced perinatal loss, it can be overwhelming to know how best to support them. The most effective approach is to be a compassionate listener and create a safe space for their grief. Follow the lead of the bereaved parents and use the language they use. For example, refer to the baby by name if that is how the family identifies their child. While you cannot change their loss, you can share the emotional burden by being willing to listen, bearing witness to their experience, and remembering their child.
In October, as we observe Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, let us not only acknowledge the prevalence of perinatal loss but also commit to breaking the silence and offering support to those who have experienced it. By fostering a compassionate and understanding community, we can help families navigate the complexities of grief and find the hope and connection they need to heal.
There are resources available, both locally and nationally, that can offer support, counseling, and opportunities for connection.
Rhode Island Resources:
Hawthorn Grief Care (Hawthorn Grief Care): Miscarriage support groups. Groups are free and take place via Zoom. Peer Facilitated by Emerald Ortiz and Jessica Rosene de Brito. Open to anyone who has experienced miscarriage. 1st Tuesday of every month, 6 pm-8 pm.
Still Birth & Infant Loss Group: Groups are free and take place via Zoom. Peer facilitated by Ada. Open to anyone who has experienced stillbirth or infant loss. 2nd Tuesday of every month, 7 pm-8 PM.
Offerings from Women and Infants (https://www.womenandinfants.org/patient-resources/support-groups):
Miscarriage, Infant Death & Stillbirth (M.I.S.) Group: Meets the first and third Wednesday of the month at 7:00 p.m. The Ronald McDonald House, 45 Gay Street, Providence. Call (401) 274-1122, extension 44049. View the M.I.S./P.A.L.S. website.
Pregnancy After Loss (P.A.L.S.) Support Group: This support group is for women who are pregnant following a loss and would like to share their fears and concerns with other women. The group meets the second Wednesday of each month at 7 pm. The Ronald McDonald House, 45 Gay Street, Providence. Call (401) 274-1122, ext. 44049. View the M.I.S./P.A.L.S. website.
National Resources:
Loss & Grief in Pregnancy & Postpartum | Postpartum Support International (PSI)
Online Support – Share Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support (nationalshare.org)
https://starlegacyfoundation.org/
Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Groups – Rachel’s Gift | Pregnancy & Infant Loss Programs (rachelsgift.org)
Article Sources:
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2022, September 30). Pregnancy and infant loss. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/stillbirth/features/pregnancy-infant-loss.html
Miscarriage. March of Dimes. (2023, February). https://www.marchofdimes.org/find-support/topics/miscarriage-loss-grief/miscarriage#:~:text=Miscarriage%20is%20very%20common.,What%20is%20a%20threatened%20miscarriage%3F
About Diana Huynh:
Diana is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker certified in Perinatal Mental Health through Postpartum Support International. Diana treats adults with a primary focus on maternal mental health. Her passion is supporting mothers and families during all points in their family planning journey, including conception/infertility, pregnancy, and postpartum. Diana joined JCS in August 2023 as the Clinical Supervisor of The Counseling Center at JCS. Have questions about The Counseling Center? Give Diana a call today at 401.331.1244.
September is Fall Prevention Month—a time dedicated to raising awareness about the importance of preventing falls among older adults. Lifeline RI, at Jewish Collaborative Services, stands at the forefront of its mission to help individuals maintain independence. Throughout this month, Lifeline RI is committed to sharing valuable insights, resources, and educational opportunities that empower older adults and their families to make informed choices about fall prevention. By embracing safety measures and taking proactive steps, we can contribute to a new season of thriving health and well-being for all.
Falls can be a significant concern for individuals as they age, affecting physical health and overall well-being. Falls do happen, but in most cases, they can often be prevented with the right strategies and support in place, allowing individuals to enjoy greater independence, peace of mind, and dignity. Here are some key strategies to incorporate in your prevention efforts:
- Home Safety Assessment: Many falls occur within the home due to hazards such as loose rugs, poor lighting, and cluttered walkways. A home safety assessment can help identify areas of improvement, such as installing grab bars in the shower and bathroom, using a non-slip mat in the shower, removing throw rugs, installing adequate lighting, and removing clutter in walkways. Click here to learn more about staying safe in the home and conducting your own home safety assessment.
- Exercise and Physical Activity: Engaging in light physical activities can play a crucial role in preventing falls among older adults. Regular movement helps improve balance, flexibility, and strength, reducing the risk of accidents. Activities like walking, tai chi, and gentle stretching can be highly effective. JCS’ Kosher Nutrition program offers chair yoga classes on Zoom and at the Dwares JCC (learn more here), and local senior centers throughout the state offer various exercise classes and programs
- Healthcare Providers: Attending routine medical appointments and keeping up with specialists is an important part of fall prevention. Providers can conduct fall risk evaluations, considering individual health conditions, medical history, and concerns. It’s good practice to see the eye doctor (optometrist) and foot doctor (podiatrist) annually.
- Medication Review: Certain medications can increase the risk of falls due to side effects like dizziness or drowsiness. Ask a doctor or pharmacist for a medication review, including prescribed and over-the-counter medications. Evaluating a medication regimen can help identify potential side effects that may increase fall risks and can be adjusted as needed.
Furthermore, alongside these preventive measures, Lifeline RI’s emergency response equipment incorporates advanced technology to offer immediate assistance should a fall happen. Automatic fall detection technology can detect falls even if the individual is unable to press the emergency button. GPS-enabled services ensure that help can be quickly dispatched to the exact location, even if the individual is away from their home.
Lifeline RI supports the independence of older adults in Rhode Island, and this commitment is reflected in our local presence and devoted team. The Lifeline RI office in Providence, RI, stands ready to provide participants with swift and efficient assistance whenever needed. This local connection fosters a sense of community and support that goes beyond providing emergency response equipment.
As we age, we must embrace solutions that prioritize safety while preserving our independence. With Lifeline RI, Rhode Islanders can navigate their golden years with confidence, knowing that they’re actively taking steps toward a safer and more independent future.
Fall Prevention Resources:
Fall Safety: Take Steps to Remain Independent Longer
Keep on Your Feet—Preventing Older Adult Falls
Fall Prevention in Older Adults
Evidence-Based Program; A Matter of Balance
Senior Centers in Rhode Island (Exercise Classes & Programs)
